So Where Do I Belong?
by Youkai Luna Sakura
Summary: Something happend to all the group except Kagome. Everyone is against her. After deciding to go back to her time, she grows depressed. She knows Kikyou & Naraku had something to do with her friends, she's just not sure how.
1. I Just Wish I Wasn’t Such A Bother

A/N: This is written for somebody. They sometimes go by the name of Lost n e Past or Bekhaz or Luna Moun. This is written for them. They are the ones who inspired me for this. 

Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyasha. The poem (_I Just Wish I Wasn't Such A Bother: A Sickness_) was written by a friend named Yamagawa no Uta.

Where Do I Belong? 

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_I Just Wish I Wasn't Such A Bother: A Sickness_

"If I'm not such a bother,

Why do you act as if I am?

Why do you turn away,

When I'm around.

Why do you act like I'm some sickness,

That if you even dare look at me,

You might get it too.

What are you talking about?

Why do you hate me?

When two seconds ago, 

You said you had always and would always

Love me.

Am I some kind of sickness your so afraid of?

Why am I such a bother?"

"Sit!" That word was heard all throughout the forest.

A young girl was standing next to a small well in a forest clearing. A hanyou boy, lay head face in the ground. Dust was everywhere. A huge hole lay under him and the soil had cracked for feet away.

"I'm not coming back! No matter what you say! I don't want to be here ever again! I don't want to see you, Miroku, Sango, Shippou, Kaede, Kouga and especially Kikyou ever again!" The young girl shouted at the boy.

"Sure. You know you will come back! I know that! You will come back! You always do!" The boy shouted back at her.

"I can't come back! I'm not wanted. I'm not needed! No one cares about me anymore. No one cares if I stay or if I go. They would much rather I go." The girl sniffled and began to cry.

"Go on and cry. Won't do you any good. I don't care. But you are right. It would be much better with you gone. You wouldn't be here to bother us. You wouldn't waste precious air either. You wouldn't eat our food. You need to go back to where you belong! You have no business here! Go back to your own time!" The hanyou yelled at her. The girl began to cry harder till it seemed everything would wake from her tears.

"SIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!" She screamed as loud as she could. She repeated the scream 23 times till she grew hoarse and had no voice because her sobs over ran them. She reached over and slapped the boy in the face as he fell to the ground. She then turned her back on him and jumped through the well.

The hanyou finally sat back up about 13 minutes after the girl had jumped through the well. He sat up and sulked. 

She's gone! Finally! But, why do I feel like I miss her? I don't know why! Hell, she's just a wench. A brainless no good wench. But, it feels like I feel different about her. Like I should run after her. Like some long ago memory.

"Inuyasha, is she gone?" A shadowy figure stepped out of the bushes surrounding the clearing. She was dressed in miko attire. A white top and long red pants. She walked over to the hanyou. She gently helped him up.

"Come on Inuyasha. We have to get back to the village. We have to plan for the wish on the Shikon no Tama." The young miko tugged on the hanyou's arm.

The hanyou blinked his eyes as if he had been in a trance. He slowly turned from the well and faced the miko. He grabbed her hand and walked beside her till they faded out of the clearing's site.

"Such an arrougant jerk!" The young girl mumbled under her breath. She climbed out of the well and landed in the well house on the Higurashi shrine. She walked out and stood out in the miserable weather of the outside. 

Dark, somber clouds lay around the shrine and all of Tokyo. Heavy rain fell everywhere and it never even mentioned lighting up.

The girl sat by her window, one week after the well incident. It was still raining. A huge typhoon was coming in from the Southern Pacific. Tokyo wouldn't get the eye of the storm, but the eye would come close. Heavy rain and some flooding was expected.

She sat and stared blankly out the window, think hard. The girl watched as the world around the shrine went on as if no rain, no girl was really there. As if she was not needed anywhere. As if, she was just an add on to the normal world.

The girl turned away from the window and slumped onto her bed. She fell into a deep sleep, remembering the conversation the hanyou boy and she had had before the world decided nothing was able to be nice and pretty.

_Flashback_

_"Inuyasha?"_

_"Kagome, I have to tell you. Before we go into this, our last battle, I must tell you…"_

_"What is it Inuyasha?_

_"I will not use the jewel to become full demon or full human."_

_"So you will stay a hanyou?"_

_"Hai."_

_"Oh Inuyasha!"_

_End of Flashback_

That wasn't the trouble with the world. Nothing could compare with what had happened after that. No one could have guessed. No one could have predicted. Fate had decided to play opposite day the next second. It had decided to let the girl have a huge heart break within all of it's strength. It had released all of it's power and evilness onto her. She knew nothing would ever be the same after that.

A/N: So how is my new fic? Ok, good, bad, sucks so bad you can't put it in words? I have read a few of those!

I'm working on "Get Over It" but I also had this little idea, and to get rid of it I decided to start on it.

Please review! Even if it is bad. It may seem a little confusing, mostly because everything isn't there. It will be in later chapters.

As for how long this will be, no clue. Just depends on how long I can put other ideas in here. 

Ja ne,

Happy fanfic hunting,

~~~Y.L.S.

Not M.S. or A.R.A.


	2. Once Upon a Day

A/N: Hey hey! I got review! Ya!!!!!

Thanks **flare** for the review. I'm sorry that it was short. Ya, I tried to make this chapter not so mysterious and tell you some facts about Kagome. 

Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyasha. Don't own the poem "Once Upon a Day" by Nanaka Gto, another friend.

Where Do I Belong? 

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_Once Upon a Day_ "Once upon a day 

Long, long ago.

A girl sat on the steps of her home.

She sat and watched the world go by before her.

She wondered if her life was like that.

Fast paced, with the slow times mixed.

And once upon that day,

She learned the true meaning of the word life.

She learned,

Once upon a day,

That life is just what some call a mid point.

And, others call,

A day."

Higurashi Kagome sat on the steps of her shrine in Tokyo, Japan. Watching the sunset. Dreaming of earlier days. 

She was a strong 21-year-old woman. She had a good job and a loving family. She hadn't really wanted to be married. But, he was pushing, hard. So, she had married Hojou. It wasn't what she wanted at all. Her real love never told her. She had nothing to hold her back anymore.

Though, she knew Hojou wouldn't last. Soon, her life grew too boring. He was a bit worse of a husband than she could have ever imagined. She finally grew too frustrated at 20, after being married for 1 year.  

Kagome knew she should have expected it. Nothing lasts forever. But, in some cases, love overcame that. But, it hadn't overcome the barrier in any of her relationships. 

Kagome kept looking off the west, watching the beautiful reds and golds fill the sky all around her. A gentle breeze from the south coddled her and whisked leaves around her and the old steps. It was the early fall and it was already cold. Kagome hugged her anorak closer to her body. 

She already knew her plans for her later life. She would be a spinster. There was no hope that she would have another husband. She was smarter than that.

Her only real love had turned her away. But, she didn't like thinking about him anymore. At first, he was all she could think of. She spent countless nights either not sleeping or crying herself to sleep over him. He wouldn't have ever cared. Kagome knew better than that now. She had really thought he cared. But, really, he was just as glad to get rid of her. 

At first, Kagome thought he might come back through the well and hug her and brush away her tears and tell her it was all just a nightmare. Or that it was all a joke. But, he never did. And she was still waiting. But, after half a year, the deepest part of her heart exposed itself and told her the truth. He was never going to come back. Never again. No one wanted her really. But, she wasn't sure what to do with her life now. 

Her grandfather had died just last year, 3 months after she and Hojou separated. Her mother was gone most of the time. Souta was away at some boarding school in England. She just wasn't sure what really called to her. It was like nothing was really sticking out. She was a little disappointed that even in her own era, people didn't want her around or left, but at least they had better reasons than her old other "so-called" friends. They had never been sincere about being her friend. 

She knew she should have been more cautious. She had been a little stupid with her life so far. Kagome knew nothing great would ever happen again.

The best moment had been in that final battle. The last time she truly remembered her friends, acting like real friends.

It had been almost a year of looking for the jewels. They had the final pieces to collect. The ones Naraku had. To get those meant everything was finished. Nothing was left to do. They could live normal, healthy and good lives. Sango and Miroku had been lovers for a while and Inuyasha and Kagome were a bit friendly with their feelings. The boundary was almost crossed. Only about a nanometer lay left. And, Inuyasha had crossed it the night before the battle. But, that didn't last long. 

That last night, they all sat around, Sango and Miroku trying to look as least conspicuous as possible, Shippou in Kagome's lap and Inuyasha being quite protective of her. Especially if Miroku ever looked at her. Or, Shippou would snuggle closer into her stomach. 

"Inuyasha it's ok." Kagome would say every time. He would still act defensive of her at all costs.

They had joked around the campfire and laughed hard that night. 

That was her last true memory of her friends, at least "acting" like her friends. Everyone seemed to know that they were wanted there. Everyone had a place. Everyone seemed needed.

The next day after the battle, Kagome couldn't stay anywhere without being threatened or hurt. Everyone seemed to have betrayed her. Nothing seemed right. It all seemed so wrong. Like everything she did was the worst thing that could happen.

The sun finally set over the western horizon. Kagome walked back up to the empty shrine. Buyo met her and walked along and could tell she was depressed. 

Kagome took off her anorak and made dinner. She couldn't ever eat ramen anymore without feeling sick. Or depressed. Everything seemed to be a blur. She only remembered getting in bed before the noise from the downstairs awoke her.

A/N: Alight, that's that chapter.

I haven't gotten a chance to update because of "Get Over It." So, gomen nasai. 

Please review, for I need to know what you think of this. I don't want to feel that no one cares, cause then I'll just delete it.

So please???

Review???

All I'm asking is just to say "it's ok." Or  "stop writing. It isn't that great." Or you could just put "ok." Or "sucks" I don't care! I just need to know someone is actually reading it!

~~~Y.L.S.

Not M.S. or A.R.A.


	3. LastEarth

A/N: Well, I'm finally back. Remember, this is not a Inu/kik, it's Inu/Kag! Or a Kag/Sess for that matter! Just making sure yall know…

Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyasha or the poem "Last Earth" by Xavier.

**So Where Do I Belong?**

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Last Earth 

"Falling away into darkness

As no light dares show in the deepness of the night,

I watch the world in paper folds.

People say this world won't be here anymore.

So where will we go?

Where will we stay?

For, where will be our,

Last earth?

If not humanity,

Who will save our pitiful planet?

Or, will humans strongest emotion

Show through?

Love…"

A loud clunk noise awoke Kagome at about 2:35 in the morning. She slowly got out of bed, a little unsure of her legs. She grabbed a bat, that her little brother had left on his last visit, in her hand. She walked slowly and quietly down the stairs. She hoped that it wasn't a burglar. She only had a bat. If he had a gun, she was in trouble. The noise had stopped, but she was sure she had heard it from the kitchen.

She stood in front of the door, in her long T-shirt and loose pants, bat in hand. Ready for anything.

Then, breathe came on her shoulder. It was warm and caused chill bumps on her cold skin. She shrieked.

"Still as scared as ever?" She knew that voice. That was his voice. The man who betrayed her.

"Go away, Inuyasha." 

"So you live alone?" Inuyasha sat down across from her at the table.

She couldn't believe she was letting him in her house. She was still mad at him, for everything. The lies, the betrayal. Yet, she wasn't kikyou. She wouldn't just leave him out cold.

"Hai." Kagome answered, looking into her cup of tea.

"Oh, not married?" Inuyasha was intrigued. He was sure she had been married.

"I was, but we divorced." Kagome still didn't look up.

"Eh? To who?" Inuyasha just waited for her to look up.

"Hojou." She still looked down.

"That bastard?" Inuyasha was annoyed. Kagome was a least better than that. Not much, but still better.

"Hai. But, things didn't work out." Kagome sighed, and looked over at the wall. Not at all looking at Inuyasha. Talking about her old marriage depressed her. Hojou just hadn't worked out at all. It was like a nightmare. That was her last chance. She knew it.

"How about you? With kikyou?" Kagome asked. This time she had a small fake smile on. In her eyes, Inuyasha could tell she wanted to rip him apart and tell him to go away. He was, he was just here for one thing really.

"Hai. Kikyou and I married a little after you left." Now Inuyasha didn't look up.

"I thought so." Kagome then stood up. "So what are you doing here?" 

"The jewel. You still have it." Inuyasha said dully. How could she not have guessed.

"I got rid of it a long time ago." Kagome said, acting blasé.

"NANIII????" Inuyasha yelled at her. 

"Shut up. I left it in your time. That's why I couldn't even come back if I even wanted." Kagome said, giving him a death stare.

"Stupid bitch. Since you don't have it, I have no reason to be here." Inuyasha flicked a stray lock of hair behind his shoulder.

"I figured that was all you wanted. So, you going to become human for kikyou?" Kagome was just a little curious.

"I don't know. Where is the jewel exactly?" Inuyasha wanted the jewel, it was the only way…

"I don't remember where it went. I just flung it somewhere." Kagome sighed and stared vacantly. She tried hard not to think about that day. It was just too painful.

"Where's your family?" Inuyasha asked on his way out the door.

"I live here alone." Kagome answered.

Inuyasha nodded and opened the door. 

"Sayonara,…wench." Inuyasha closed the door and walked back out to the well house.

_Of course…why else would he be here? Certainly not to see me. _

Kagome lay in bed. She couldn't sleep. She lay thinking about Inuyasha. She wouldn't admit it to herself. 

She still was completely in love with him.

I just don't understand. Why did he do what he did? 

A/N: Ok ok! Don't kill me for the short chapter! I'm writing another one which should be up in like a little while. Don't start killing me or giving me all those death threats!

~~~Y.L.S.


	4. One Way True Love Part 1

A/N: Ok I'm getting this out before all the nasty death threats and all that other stuff come in!

Don't own Inuyasha or the song "One Way True Love" from Mahou Tsukai Tai!.

**So Where Do I Belong?**

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_One Way True Love_

That morning something in Kagome snapped. She got up out of bed and got dressed, to kill. As she walked down the street, to the grocery, every guy, even the old men, looked at her and couldn't help but wink or nudge another. Showing more leg then she had in forever, her outfit was also **quite** form fitting. No guy could resist. She knew that.

After coming out with a huge sack full of stuff, she walked back up the stairs to the well house. __

_I can get through this well, can't I? I still have that one shard. That last separate shard._ Kagome squeezed the cord in her pocket. She had always had that shard. She had forgotten that day that she had it separate. Ever since Inuyasha pushed her in the well and kept the shards, she kept one with her constantly to make sure she could get back.

_Well, here goes nothing…_

"Ever since I was really small I've always believed my prince will come

Someone told me 'there's no such thing as real true love- why even bother?'

But then, when I dream at night, blind faith is never in vain

But then, when I wake up in the morning- why am I still all alone?"

Kagome waltzed out of the well hole. Nobody was around. She hadn't expected anyone anyway. But, she could smell the village. She was finally going to get the real story on this whole incident. She thought it was best to talk to Sango…

"Sango?" Kagome said to the woman in the garden.

"Who's…Kagome. It's you." Sango's voice dropped on the end. 

"Listen, I want to know something. Do you still hate me?" Kagome asked.

"NO! That day was a total accident! Come on inside. I'll tell you about it." Sango sat up and brushed off her hands. 

"Sit. Alright, that morning do you remember it?" Sango asked.

"Yes."

"Good. Well, later on in that same week, we found that kikyou had slipped something around us. It was, like a potion. It made it so we hated you. She wanted us to hate you, really bad. When we found out and got our senses back, we demanded that Inuyasha get you back. He knew very well what had happened, but he still refused."

"Why?"

"I'm still not sure. Stupid stubborn hanyou jerk…" Sango went off muttering.

"Where is he?" Kagome got up. She just wanted to see his face.

"At Kaede's right now. You better go now. Kikyou will be back at the end of the day." Sango pointed out. 

"Arigatou Sango! Ja!" Kagome ran off in the direction of Kaede's hut.

"Kagome, child!" Kaede was shocked by Kagome's entrance.

"What are you mumbling about babaa…no, it's not." Inuyasha walked out of the shadows.

"You! How? You don't have any shards! Or, no, you simply lied." Inuyasha spat at her.

"I forgot. I've had this shard for a while now. I came back to see you all." Kagome said.

"YOU aren't welcome here!" Inuyasha yelled.

"I'm staying with Kaede, not you!" Kagome yelled back.

"I live with kikyou and Kaede!" Inuyasha said.

"I never said I'm staying with you. Simply Kaede." Kagome gave him a perfectly calm look. He gave her a pissed off one.

"Whatever." He walked off.

"Inuyasha…what are you doing here near my Inuyasha?" It seemed that kikyou had made her entrance…

Kagome lay down on her futon. Inuyasha slept with kikyou in the other on the other side of the room.

"I know you can't live life just on horoscopes -- without courage you won't get far and

When someone else has their eye on him, you gotta speak up and say something 'fore it's too late

Don't be shy, tell him just how you feel.  If it's meant to be I'll be ok, right?

Everyone has someone just for them, but what happens when they don't even know you're alive? It's

One way true love"

Kagome grunted. She hated the picture in front of her. Inuyasha with his arms around kikyou and his head on her neck. She was glad they just weren't doing anything in front of her.

"Your awake wench." Inuyasha peeked open an eye.

"May I talk to you Inuyasha? Privately!" Kagome asked. He got up and she walked outside, him following.

"How many times must I say it to get it through you're thick hanyou skull, I'M HERE TO SEE MY REAL FRIENDS! THE ONES WHO DIDN'T ABANDON ME, UNLIKE YOU! I'VE NOW LEARNED THAT I SHOULD HAVE NEVER TRUSTED YOU OR BELIEVED A WORD YOU SAID! YOU SIMPLY LIED AND LIED, TWO-TIMED ME AND TWO-TIMED ME, BETRAYED AND BETRAYED!!!!! YET, THE LAST TIME, AFTER GOING THROUGH ABOUT 900 MILLION TIMES OF THAT, I FINALLY CRACKED!!!! Get it now?!?!?!"

"Kagome, shut up." Inuyasha said.

"See! You still don't get it! I'm not the same! Except…"

"What?!"

"I…still…love…you. That's what you don't get! You don't know what I've gone through in the last 5 years!"

"No Kagome. You should never have loved me."

"Don't you get it? I'm not here to steal you. God knows I want to. I just, I'm trying to be mindful."

"Kagome…just…leave me alone!" Inuyasha stamped and walked back inside.

_She couldn't. There is no way she could really still love me. _Inuyasha thought to himself. __

_I never meant to hurt her. I'm really sure now. She gone. There isn't Kagome left. Just someone little doll. I couldn't have done that! I DIDN'T! I KNOW IT!!!_

A/N: Well, that my other chapter for yall. Man, that one really flowed. No stops at all! Gosh, well, this fic will probably be probably 6 to 9 chapters long. Just for your future planning and all…you know. To be nice and sweet and all the rest of that saccharine sappy stuff. The stuff I hate… 

~~~Y.L.S.


	5. The Final Address

**5.25.05**

This is somewhat of a copy from my profile, but I have elongated it for this page. Please read it with my deepest apologies to you, my darling, **darling** readers.

I'm not writing fanfiction anymore. Very sorry, but chaps, I'm nearing my 25th birthday, I just got out of grad school and just got engaged. Yes, that right. YLS got engaged. Never thought it could happen? Well, neither did I! Exciting time for me, yes, but I'm afraid that after 2 years of not updating, what do you expect from me? I'm done. I'm an old hag who has to throw the towel in. I started this when I was what, 21? 22? It's been great. It really has. I just have a life outside the internet that awaits me. I can't escape it any longer. The real world calls. I may be getting older, but I promise I'm not growing up. I will never grow up. Just because we grow older, that doesn't mean we have to grow up. I have greatly appreciated all the support you, my fantastic readers, have given me, but it's somewhat over. It's never really over. Even in death, we have some sort of immortality that keeps us here. No, I'm not dying. No, I don't have cancer, no I don't have tuberculosis, and no, I'm not giving in to corporate America. I'm simply ending on chapter of my life and starting another. Surely you fanfiction-ers can understand that? I'm starting a sequel to this book full of chapters. Who knows what can happen.

If you are angry with me, why? Everyone needs a life. Plenty of things go unfinished in life. You just have to accept them and move on. If anyone wishes to take one or two or all of my fics and complete them, write a sequel, write a prequel, parody them, whatever, simply email me here at and tell me and I'll probably give you permission, but it's always best to ask first.

My fondest wishes to you all in your travels through life, death, the afterlife, the Bahamas and everywhere in between.

_Akiko Fukuda aka YLS_


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